Making clear requests

20160711_124828Talking to a friend recently, I realised they had arrived for our supper in an incredibly frustrated frame of mind.  They were lost in the clouds of a bad mood and a torrent of stress.

After a short breathing exercise to help them settle down we explored what was going on.  Apparently people weren’t doing what she wanted them to do…  Time after time..  How could people let her down this way?

As we carried on I began to realise that she wasn’t really asking them to do things…  Instead she was dropping polite hints – she is after all, really really nice.  So rather than, asking “can that report be done by Friday at 3pm” she was saying “it would be really helpful if the report was ready by the end of the week“.

If you want something, generally, it’s easier for all concerned to ask directly.  Of course, it can be polite, friendly, considerate – but please ask.  Great insights here from @justinadamwise

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